20 Reasons Why You Know You’re a Sports Fan From Chicago
Chicago Sports Fans: They Are Who We Thought They Were!
Chicago isn't all about skyscrapers, deep dish pizza and freezing cold January nights. Instead, the city on the lake is actually rather complex as people from across the globe come to the Windy City with the word "opportunity" on the mind. While Chicago might be all about business during the day, this town knows how to have a good time as well.
Thankfully, the glorious city has a handful of professional sports teams that are usually good fodder for some clean fun. Of course, if your name is Steve Bartman then you would probably disagree. Sure, the Windy City has a few bad eggs, but which city doesn't?
Besides, I think the city as a whole can agree that the Bartman incident is hardly a bigger story than the careers of icons like Walter Payton, Michael Jordan, Ernie Banks, Stan Mikita and Frank Thomas -- just to name a few. With such a rich history of highly-competitive sports teams, Chicago's fan base has been able to form an identity that includes quite a bit of bravado.
At the end of the day; Chicago sports fans are confident, exuberant and always have a quick one-liner to make you laugh right off of your chair. Please join me in enjoying this rundown of 20 different reasons why you are definitely a Chicago sports fan at heart.
You Know Chicago Fire As A Soccer Team, Not A T.V. Show
Chicago Fire the T.V. show is definitely more popular than the soccer team, but hey let's give the futbol club some love. Besides, Toyota Park is a nice place to go catch a soccer game or as I like to call it "take a nap."
You Have To Defend Soldier Field's Spaceship Design All The Time
Ignorant Green Bay Packers fan: "Bro, your stadium looks like a spaceship!"
Under the influence Chicago Bears fan: "Dude, it's freaking majestic look at all the glass."
The Midwestern United States of America in a nutshell.
Michael Jordan Can Win You Any Debate, No Matter The Argument
To quote the film Bad Teacher "It's the only argument I need Shawn!"
Michael Jordan isn't like a God in Chicago, he is a God. The guy had his own statue outside the United Center at age 31! On top of that, the Bulls retired his number just for him to come back and win three more rings. Again, No. 23 and/or No. 45 can and will win you any argument.
You Miss Ron Santo Just As Much As Harry Caray
Ron Santo and Harry Caray shouldn't be compared to one another. However, the two Baseball Hall of Famers will forever be linked as iconic Chicago Cubs' broadcasters. Of course, Santo is more known for his playing days, while Caray's signature "Holy Cow!" call remains popular to this day.
Chicago misses ya, Ron and Harry.
You Call U.S. Cellular Field "The Cell" For Obvious Reasons
Chicago fans know all about the North Side vs. South Side brawl that goes on each summer. And with this type of battle comes a few great nicknames. Of course, anyone who has gone to Chicago knows the South side is a little rough around the edges. Hence, U.S. Cellular Field is known as the "Cell" as in prison cell. Or at least that's what Chicago Cubs fans say.
You Didn't Know What Hockey Was Prior To 2010
Alright, don't get all mad at me -- it's meant to be a joke. Kind of. The Chicago Blackhawks weren't on the city's radar for quite some time and now? Well they are the talk of the town with two Stanley Cup Trophies in four years. Chicago doesn't have bandwagon fans...Chicago creates a bandwagon and then jumps on it. Big difference from your buddy who is a Miami Heat fan despite living in the great state of Nevada.
Walter Payton's Death Still Stings
Walter Payton was the epitome of class. Unfortunately, the ridiculously talented running back only lived to be 55 years old. Payton was the greatest Chicago Bear of all time and his legacy lives on in Chicago to this day. In fact, Soldier Field is always littered with No. 34 jerseys as "Sweetness" is still the best nickname in the history of Windy City sports.
You Appreciate Scottie Pippen For What He Was
Listen: Scottie Pippen was more than Michael Jordan's right-hand man. Sure, No. 33 benefited from playing with the greatest NBA player of all time, but Pippen is his own person and Chicago folks are the first to give "No Tip Pip" his due.
You Appreciate Ozzie Guillen For What He Was
Oh boy, the mouth of the south himself. Ozzie Guillen went from that scrappy Chicago White Sox shortstop to a World Series Champion manager in a matter of a decade. However, someone with an ego the size of Guillen's wasn't going to last in Chicago.
Guillen followed the path of Mike Ditka if you ask me or most Chicago fans. Both guys were "fiery leaders" when they won a championship, yet were labelled as "loose cannons" once the team went south. That's the nature of the beast and Guillen knows all too well about the grinder that is Chicago media.
You Trust DePaul, Northwestern and Illinois Basketball Less Than Your Ex-Wife
If the DePaul Blue Demons and/or the Northwestern Wildcats ever put it together for an entire college basketball season then Chicago would morph into a college town. However, that is never going to happen solely because both programs are complete garbage.
The funniest part is that these supposed "Chicago schools" can't even recruit in their own backyard. For crying out loud: Derrick Rose and Jabari Parker left the Windy City for places like Memphis, Tennessee and Durham, North Carolina. That's just bad news.
You Truly Have No Clue What "It's Gonna Happen" Even Means
What I don't understand here is the "It's." My guess is a World Series Championship, but I really can't be so sure. Either way, Chicago Cubs fans toss this things around like fools all summer long. Perhaps I shouldn't be so harsh. I mean, the whole "Wait 'Til Next Year" concept isn't much better...
You Will Never Utter The Words "Sexy Rexy" Again
Do I really need to even go into detail here? No part of Rex Grossman is "sexy." It's that simple.
Miller Park Is Referred To As "Wrigley Field North"
Hey, do you know what Illinois' largest state park is? Wisconsin.
Seriously though, if you go to a Chicago Cubs vs. Milwaukee Brewers game in late June then you will see just how infested Miller Park is with Cubbie blue. Wrigley Field North is quite the home away from home.
You Ride The College Football Bandwagon Like A Pro
Here's how College Football season goes in Chicago:
Week 1: "Go Northwestern!"
Week 2: "Go Illinois!"
Week 3: "Go Notre Dame!"
Week 4: "Go Northern Illinois!"
Week 5: "Ah, forget it."
You Are Ashamed Of Steve Bartman Fiasco
How could you ruin a man's life because he wanted to catch a foul ball? Chicago Cubs fans know that what they did to Steve Bartman and it's downright shameful. Now Bartman is forced to live his life under a rock over 10 years later all because Moises Alou had to act like a child. Even worse, the poor guy didn't even get an apology. Well, here's one on behalf of Chicago, Steve: Sorry.
You Would Have Gladly Taken Derrick Rose's SATs For Him
Derrick Rose might be in the Chicago doghouse right now, yet it hasn't always been like that. In fact, Rose is a Chicago product, who took the city by storm at age 18. And yes everyone knows Rose's mishap with the SATs. He had someone take his test for him. So what? Are you jealous or something? Go Bulls.
Hawk Harrelson Has Made You A Smarter Baseball Fan
Hey may be old as sin. He may be annoying as your uncle Frank when he has had to much to drink, but he's a Chicago legend. Hawk Harrelson teaches you a lesson every time the White Sox come on and that's something any baseball fan can enjoy.
You Have Been Shouting "Detroit Sucks" Since Fourth Grade
You Enjoyed The Steroid Era -- A Lot
A "dark age" for baseball? Try telling that to a Chicago Cubs fan who watched a handful of awful teams just to see Sammy Sosa nail a solo home run in the ninth inning of a 14-3 loss and blow kisses to the camera. Sosa was big-time in Chicago and although the White Sox didn't have a steroid freak like Sosa on their team; 2014 Hall of Famer Frank Thomas played during the era, which was actually a great time to be Sox fan.
If You Hear "Da Bears" One More Time You Will Lose It
"Bill Swerski's Superfans" is a Saturday Night Live skit that is likely older than half of the people walking around yelling "Da Bears." Come on, folks it's not 1991 anymore. Stop saying "Da" before team names. Or else.