The 10 Worst Ways to Get Kicked Out of Sporting Events
Worst Ways to Get Kicked out of a Sporting Event
Getting kicked out of a sporting event is half a rite of passage and half the lowest point in your life. You may end up on the jumbo screen, which could be good or bad, or you might just get roughed up a bit by security guards and tossed into the parking lot. There are bad ways to get kicked out of a game, and then there are the worst ways to get kicked out.
If you plan on getting kicked out, obviously this is better for you because at least you’re prepared. However, sometimes the well thought out ways of getting kicked out end in the worst way. Usually involving embarrassing body positions and humiliating facial expressions captured by the best photographers in the business.
If you get thrown out unexpectedly, or at least in a way that was not premeditated, you likely let the adrenaline or alcohol get the best of you, bringing out the worst in you.
The annoying times are when you just have a brain fart. I’m talking about the time when you lost your marbles for three seconds. You started to listen to the evil devil on your shoulder telling you how majestic that thing in your hand will look as it flies through the air and onto the court. He’s whispering in your ear what to yell at the referee, and suddenly, he wins. Then, before you know it, you’re outside the stadium, hearing the muffled crowd roar, feeling a bit down on yourself, with just a slight hint of pride.
Vomiting on a Family
Vomiting in a public place is already pretty awful, but if you’re at a sporting event, there’s a good chance you’re going to vomit on a pleasant little family just trying to watch an afternoon game.
Going to the Bathroom in the Wrong Bathroom
You probably won’t get kicked out if you’re a woman who used the men’s bathroom, but there’s a good chance you will if you’re a man using a women’s bathroom. I don’t make the rules, people. Either way you look at it, this is not a classy way to get kicked out of a stadium.
Throwing Your $10 Beer
Beer is expensive, and you like to drink it. Throw a soda. Or if you’re at a Detroit game, throw a pop.
Naked Running, Naked Getting Kicked Out
The streaking thing may look funny when you’re running, but then you get tackled and taken off the field…naked. It’s not a good look, not for anyone.
Using Hot Dogs as a Weapon
Yes, hot dogs make hilarious projectiles, but I’ll invoke the beer argument made before: They’re way too expensive, and you really like to eat them.
Getting in a Fight at a Game By Yourself
If you’re going to get in a fight at a game, don’t make it a game you attended by yourself. No back up, and it's just sad all around.
Heckling Your Home Team
If you’re watching your home team play, and you get kicked out for heckling them, you should not be allowed back into your home stadium.
Talking Trash to a Referee as a Washed up Alumni
If you’re a washed up former athlete, don’t go to your alma mater’s game, yell at the referee and then get kicked out. (See N.C. State’s Tom Gugliotta and Chris Corchiani).
Getting in a Fight with Your Kid Watching
If you’re going to get into a fight at a game, don’t make it a game where you just brought your kid. Self-explanatory, hopefully.
Breaking a Trophy
Sometimes players go to the stands while raising a trophy high above their heads, giving the lowly fans a chance to touch the trophy. Don’t be the guy who gets kicked out of the stadium for breaking the trophy during this magical moment.