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Top 30 Most Unfortunate Athlete Names of All Time

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Most Unfortunate Athlete Names

athlete names
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Sports today have garnered so much attention that it's almost unreal how many fans some athletes have. While it's a great thing that sports are growing rapidly in popularity, there are some athletes who wish it wasn't so rapid of a growth. Why would any athlete wish for a lack of popularity within a sport? Are they shy? Are they known to crumble under immense pressure? None of the above. It's because of their name.

What do I mean by this?

Some athletes in sports today and in the past have been handed a rather unfortunate name by their parents -- or maybe it is the last name that has been haunting them for their entire life. Sure, these athletes are famous, but sometimes it's for the complete wrong reason.

Some athletes don't like publicity because they are not big fans of being the center of attention while others just don't like the stress that fame brings. The athletes on this list are much different, however, as they do not want the recognition because their name is one of the most embarrassing things in sports.

I have compiled a list of the 30 most unfortunate athlete names in sports today. These guys and girls have names that are so unfortunate, no mother should ever make their child suffer through them. When I say they are embarrassing, I mean like really embarrassing. Some of these athletes can't help that their last name is stuck with them forever, no matter what, while others have parents who just wanted their children to suffer -- just a sick idea.

So, here it is. Let's take a look at the list of top 30 most unfortunate athlete names of all time. If I have missed any gems, let me know.

Connor Muldowney is a columnist for RantSports.com. Follow him on Twitter @Connormuldowney, “Like” him on Facebook or add him to your network on Google. You can also reach him at connor.muldowney@rantsports.com.

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30. Coco Crisp

crisp
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The cereal or the baseball player?

Sport: Baseball

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29. Dong Dong

dong
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The more infamous of the Dong brothers.

Sport: Men's gymnastics/Olympian

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28. Picabo Street

street
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Nothing like being named after a children's game -- peek-a-boo.

Sport: Skiing/Olympian

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27. Doug Fister

fister
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Let's keep your name G-rated, Doug.

Sport: Baseball

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26. Smush Parker

parker
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Why would a parent ever name their child Smush? Seriously.

Sport: Basketball

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25. Wolfgang Wolf

wolf
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Raised by wolves.

Sport: Soccer

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24. Longar Longar

longar
Getty Images

Not to be mistaken with Chris Berman's son Back Back Back.

Sport: Basketball

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23. Uwe Blab

blab
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Pretty boring guy.

Sport: Basketball

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22. Kim Yoo-Suk

yoo-suk
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No, Kim, you suck.

Sport: Pole vault/track & field

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21. Destinee Hooker

hooker
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No one wants that to be their destiny.

Sport: Volleyball

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20. Tokyo Sexwale

sexwale
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I don't even want to know why Tokyo has one of these. Oh wait, that's actually a person's name?

Sport: Involved with Fifa

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19. David Seaman

seaman
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David loves boats -- and the sea.

Sport: Soccer

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18. Kyle Sackrider

sackrider
Twitter

His parents felt his pain and gave him a normal first name.

Sport: Football

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17. Chief Kickingstallionsims

kickingstallionsims
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This guy is not to be messed with.

Sport: Basketball

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16. Sonny Sixkiller

sixkiller
Twitter

At least he stopped at six.

Sport: Football

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15. Karen Cockburn

cockburn
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Ouch. Sounds pretty painful.

Sport: Women's gymnastics/Olympian

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14. Ron Tugnutt

tugnutt
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Ron, what are you doing over there? Never mind.

Sport: Hockey

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13. Prapawadee Jaroenrattanatarakoon

jaroenrattanatarakoon
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A broadcaster's nightmare.

Sport: Weight lifting/Olympian

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12. God Shammgod

shammgod
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He thinks pretty highly of himself, eh?

Sport: Basketball

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11. Steve Sharts

sharts
Twitter

Never go to the bathroom after Steve.

Sport: Baseball

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10. Miroslav Satan

satan
Getty Images

Pretty scary looking guy with a fitting last name.

Sport: Hockey

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9. Phyllis Mangina

mangina
Twitter

Phyllis, I feel bad for your children as well.

Sport: Women's basketball

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8. Dick Butkus

butkus
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Okay, I'm starting to question my maturity.

Sport: Football

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7. Dick Pole

pole
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Really, Mom and Dad?

Sport: Baseball

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6. Dick Paradise

paradise
Twitter

The one first name that his parents needed to avoid and they just couldn't resist.

Sport: Hockey

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5. Misty Hyman

hyman
Getty Images

Not even going to touch this one. Insert your own joke here.

Sport: Swimming/Olympian

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4. Harry Colon

colon
Twitter

Not something you should be proud of.

Sport: Football

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3. Fair Hooker

hooker
Twitter

The fairest in town.

Sport: Football

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2. Dick Trickle

trickle
Getty Images

Legendary race car driver. Even more legendary name.

Sport: Racing

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1. Rusty Kuntz

kuntz
Twitter

That sounds like a serious problem.

Sport: Baseball