20 Athletes Who Dominate Pro Sports With Their ‘Dad Bods’

There are three certainties in life: Death, taxes, and the fact that the ‘Dad Bod’ is not going away. Dad bods aren’t just built for utility, but as these 20 athletes artistically demonstrate, are also primed for precision at the highest level:

20 Athletes Who Dominate Pro Sports With Their ‘Dad Bods’

There are three certainties in life: Death, taxes, and the fact that the ‘Dad Bod’ is not going away. Dad bods aren’t just built for utility, but as these 20 athletes artistically demonstrate, are also primed for precision at the highest level:

20. Bartolo Colon

I’m sure Bartolo Colon is Spanish for “Dad Bod,” but I’ll let scribes wiser than I settle that debate. Not only is Colon an MLB pitcher, but he stars in the National League. A place where pitchers hit, runs count, and physiques might not matter. Also, is that Jon Bernthal hiding in there?

20. Bartolo Colon

I’m sure Bartolo Colon is Spanish for “Dad Bod,” but I’ll let scribes wiser than I settle that debate. Not only is Colon an MLB pitcher, but he stars in the National League. A place where pitchers hit, runs count, and physiques might not matter. Also, is that Jon Bernthal hiding in there?

19. Tom Brady

You remember the NFL Draft combine photo, but has Tom Brady been maintaining his dad bod? Despite strong advances in nutrition and kinetic science, Tom Terrific has kept a little flab to satisfy his dad bod following.

19. Tom Brady

You remember the NFL Draft combine photo, but has Tom Brady been maintaining his dad bod? Despite strong advances in nutrition and kinetic science, Tom Terrific has kept a little flab to satisfy his dad bod following.

18. Miguel Cabrera

This dad bod doesn’t let anything slide across the plate. There’s old-man strength and then there’s God-given dad bod ability. Looks like Miguel Cabrera is able to implement both.

18. Miguel Cabrera

This dad bod doesn’t let anything slide across the plate. There’s old-man strength and then there’s God-given dad bod ability. Looks like Miguel Cabrera is able to implement both.

17. Glen Davis

Big Baby has a big case of dad bod, yet still ambles the floor like a gazelle.

Okay, a mule deer.

17. Glen Davis

Big Baby has a big case of dad bod, yet still ambles the floor like a gazelle.

Okay, a mule deer.

16. Peyton Manning

I believe the greatest requisite for becoming a Sheriff is being a daddy. Currently, Peyton Manning has two children. So presently, Manning has a dad bod.

16. Peyton Manning

I believe the greatest requisite for becoming a Sheriff is being a daddy. Currently, Peyton Manning has two children. So presently, Manning has a dad bod.

15. Eli Manning

Okay, the Manning’s are basically a dad bod factory.

15. Eli Manning

Okay, the Manning’s are basically a dad bod factory.

14. Ben Roethlisberger

Ben Roethlisberger looks like he’s been somebody’s dad since 2007. That’s about eight years in dad bod time.

14. Ben Roethlisberger

Ben Roethlisberger looks like he’s been somebody’s dad since 2007. That’s about eight years in dad bod time.

13. Yadier Molina

This backstop is all dad bod and the St. Louis Cardinals faithful wouldn’t prefer anyone of lesser BMI.

13. Yadier Molina

This backstop is all dad bod and the St. Louis Cardinals faithful wouldn’t prefer anyone of lesser BMI.

12. Aaron Rodgers

No, it's a cardigan... but thanks for asking!

12. Aaron Rodgers

No, it's a cardigan... but thanks for asking!

11. Jay Cutler

No, obviously not the bodybuilder Jay Cutler. We’re talking about the Chicago Bears’ "dadliest catch."

11. Jay Cutler

No, obviously not the bodybuilder Jay Cutler. We’re talking about the Chicago Bears’ "dadliest catch."

10. Boris Diaw

We’ve found a slimming angle of Boris Diaw, but that’s so we can show you one of his principal dad tactics — yell-spitting.

10. Boris Diaw

We’ve found a slimming angle of Boris Diaw, but that’s so we can show you one of his principal dad tactics — yell-spitting.

9. Pablo Sandoval

The rare dad-bodded panda can be quite fierce when emerging from its natural resting state.

9. Pablo Sandoval

The rare dad-bodded panda can be quite fierce when emerging from its natural resting state.

8. Sebastian Janikowski

Standing next to the classically taut Matt Schaub will really put you in the dad zone.

8. Sebastian Janikowski

Standing next to the classically taut Matt Schaub will really put you in the dad zone.

7. Phil Mickelson

The coordinates to Mickelson’s center of gravity remain unknown, but accolades of his golf game are no mystery.

7. Phil Mickelson

The coordinates to Mickelson’s center of gravity remain unknown, but accolades of his golf game are no mystery.

6. David Ortiz

Get off the tracks when the dad train is comin' through!

6. David Ortiz

Get off the tracks when the dad train is comin' through!

5. Jameis Winston

Jameis Winston is a finely tuned athlete and I won't let you mock his man gut!

5. Jameis Winston

Jameis Winston is a finely tuned athlete and I won't let you mock his man gut!

4. Prince Fielder

Like father, like son, the Fielders have fielded two generations of dad bod.

4. Prince Fielder

Like father, like son, the Fielders have fielded two generations of dad bod.

3. Dustin Byfuglien

This terror on skates could have his dad frame rocking your weak body well before you could even pronounce "Byfuglien."

3. Dustin Byfuglien

This terror on skates could have his dad frame rocking your weak body well before you could even pronounce "Byfuglien."

2. Kendrick Perkins

Scholars maintain Kendrick Perkins founded the dad bod.

2. Kendrick Perkins

Scholars maintain Kendrick Perkins founded the dad bod.

1. Matthew Stafford

Matthew Stafford looks like a human Teddy Graham. But I’m sure there’s a good reason for it, I mean Stafford’s body is well insulated against the weekly beatings of the NFL and his girlfriend is smoking hot.

1. Matthew Stafford

Matthew Stafford looks like a human Teddy Graham. But I’m sure there’s a good reason for it, I mean Stafford’s body is well insulated against the weekly beatings of the NFL and his girlfriend is smoking hot.