St. Louis Cardinals: Speechless


I despise journalist who write in first person.  It’s cheap.  It’s lazy.  It’s unprofessional.  It’s distracting.  It undermines any meaning that the article once contained.  Again, I despise it. Apparently the St. Louis Cardinals do not realize this.  They are […]

Garcia to the DL: Left Shoulder Strain


After one of Jamie Garcia’s more impressive starts during his 2010 rookie season Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright gave him a very sincere tip of the cap.  They both made statements to members of the press, myself included, along the […]

Be Patient With Matt Adams


St. Louis, Mo – The Cardinals newly appointed young slugging savior of St. Louis has been making a dramatic impact since his arrival in the Gateway City.  Matt Adams has taken Arch dwellers by storm with his .351 average, .400 […]

Clay Zavada (Memphis) Would Add Lefty Relief


St. Louis, Mo – It is becoming increasingly evident that the St. Louis Cardinals are in desperate need of a true, quality left handed specialist with one of the best mustaches in the fine country of ours.  Now this is […]

Another One Bites the Dust: Matt Carpenter to the DL


St. Louis, Mo – My dear friends, the evil dark beast known as the injury bug has reared its evil head once again; Matt Carpenter has been assigned to the 15-day disabled list with a strained right side muscle. Carpenter […]

Adam Wainwright Returning to Proper Form

Troy Taormina-US PRESSWIRE

St. Louis, Mo – Never fear, my cheerers of the valiant St. Louis Cardinals, for the Red Bird’s knight in shining armor is returning to his proper throne at the head of the round table.  Adam Wainwright is once again […]

Yadi Being Yadi: Yadier Molina is Mr. Clutch


St. Louis, Mo – The ladies of St. Louis swoon at the very mention of his name.  Their knees buckle as they faint at the sight of him while gentlemen try to figure out this strange obsession with the Cardinals […]

Cards release Romero, Call up Sanchez | Quick Hitters


  St. Louis, Mo – The St. Louis Cardinals have released 2008 World Series champion, J.C. Romero and called up the young right handed pitcher, Eduardo Sanchez, from Triple-A Memphis to join them for tonight’s match-up against the Chicago Cubs. […]

Power Leads to Cardinals First Sweep

Jennifer Stewart-US PRESSWIRE

Go into your closet, kids, and break out your mother’s favorite broom because finally, ladies and gentlemen, the Cardinals have finished off a sweep. St. Louis victimized the Arizona Diamondbacks in all three games of the series as they outscored […]

Don’t Mess With the Carlos Beltran

Mark J. Rebilas-US PRESSWIRE

Taking a cue from “Jesus” in the “Big Lebowski,” Carlos Beltran is informing opposing pitchers “Don’t mess (censored version) with the Beltran.”  The newest power hitting member of the Cardinals has proved to be just what the doctor ordered for […]

Aggressiveness Will Pay Off For Cardinals


St. Louis, Mo. – It’s a three – two game in the bottom of the ninth with the edge belonging to the Milwaukee Brewers.  There is one out with runners on first and third.  One of the team’s most clutch […]

LYNNsational: Lance Lynn Dominant for Red Birds


St. Louis, Mo – Please pardon the horrible use of the overused alteration of such a tasteful word in the title of this article.  The success of the NBA’s Jermey Lynn and the resulting “LYNNsainty” seems to still be having […]