Darko Milicic to Bust Out in Boston

By Nir Regev
Brace Hemmelgarn-US PRESSWIRE

Never to be outdone by their rivals in the west coast, the Boston Celtics have an answer for Dwight Howard . An ace in the hole, a wildcard if you will, the mysterious engima that is Darko Milicic.

Milicic, who averaged an impressive career high 4.6 points and 3.3 rebounds last season while leading the Minnesota Timberwolves to a second round lottery birth, is ready. He’s going to pounce on the position like Raymond Felton at a Dunkin’ Donuts.

The man is flying from overseas today to allow the Celtics to feast their eyes on what greatness really means. Usually 0.9 blocks a game and fouling out within two minutes of play. Look out league, you’re about to find out what the Serbian gangster really stands for. If the Celtics decide to bring in Milicic, it will be his seventh team since entering the league, but hey who’s counting? The more teams Darko is on, the more gameplans he’s ready for. He’s battle tested, a true veteran.

Milicic, is willing to take less money to play for the Celtics, even though he’s a living legend overseas. Why? Because some men aren’t looking for anything logical like money. They can’t be bought, coached, or reasoned with. Some men just want to foul out. Every first quarter. He’s the hero Boston needs, but not the one they deserve right now.

Till next time I’m Nir Regev, your Standup Comedian.
See more of my work at: BSPN, BroScience.org, HecklerSpray, and on Youtube.

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