By Miotch @_Report on July 18, 2014
There's that famous Tennessee Williams quote, "America has only three cities: New York, San Francisco and New Orleans. Everywhere else is Cleveland." That's all going to change now that LeBron James is back, though.
During the NFL lockout not too long ago, then-Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis said in an interview that violence would go up if the labor issues weren't resolved. And Lewis was right — when there’s nothing good to watch on TV, violence goes up. And when people aren't committing crimes for money, they're working for it.
Poor Kyrie Irving. He just didn't have what it takes to put a team on his back. But now he can win because he has LeBron James. A winning team creates a buzz, and when you're buzzed, you spend money.
With LeBron James' star power back home, the Cavaliers will no doubt shatter attendance records. That won't just make Cleveland owner Dan Gilbert tons of money, but local businesses will likewise get a large cash reward.
Now that LeBron James is back and Kyrie Irving is locked up, Cleveland fans will stop running onto the court. And if they're not running onto the court, they'll stick around and spend money.
Man, now that LeBron James is back in Cleveland, every game is going to be like the World Cup. That will bring in tourists like crazy and, unlike the rude, stingy locals, tourists are easily duped into spending insane amounts of money.
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