15 Reasons Why You Know You’re a Sports Fan of the USC Trojans
15 Reasons Why You Know You're a Sports Fan of the USC Trojans
There are fans, and then there are USC Trojans fans.
While some schools will flaunt how “die hard” or “hardcore” their fans are, USC doesn't need to. Because USC fans don't care. Don't like the Trojans? Sorry, we can't hear you over the sound of our 11 National Championships, 38 conference titles, 6 Heisman Trophies, 24 Rose Bowls, and 80 All-Americans. Because we're obnoxious like that.
In the ESPN Encyclopedia Of College Football, it states “Not surprisingly, Game Day at USC seems more like a celebration of the history of the program than of any collective concern about victory or the opponent. It's traditionally been almost a given that the Trojans will win.”
Trojans just tend to roll that way.
Few fan bases are so universally reviled and despised as USC Trojans fans, and that's exactly how Trojan Nation likes it. We're not here to make friends, we're here to win. Call a USC fan an obnoxious loudmouth, and we'll probably shake your hand and thank you for the compliment. Because USC.
How can you tell if you're Trojans material? Can you do a SoCal Spell-out? Or is it your ringtone? Do you wear Cardinal and Gold, or do you bleed it? Can you decide to spit on a UCLA jersey before the Notre Dame jersey – or do you just wonder what both those burp-rags are doing in your house to begin with? Do you say “Fight On” or do you live it?
Here's 15 signs that will prove you're a USC Trojans fan....
No 15 You Think Of This Before A Job Interview
Or any challenging situation, really.
Walking into a big meeting? First date? Divorce proceedings? Real USC fans will put "Tribute To Troy" on, put in the earbuds, and walk in there head high, chest out, standing tall and like a Trojan.
No 14 You Have More Photos Of You Doing Victory Fingers Than Without
In fact, why would you even bother taking photos without Victory Fingers? How else would anyone know how awesome you are? Isn't your proudest moment the first time your kid held up two fingers and said "Fight On!"?
No 13 Your Will States 'Conquest' Be Played At Your Funeral
And why shouldn't it be?
No 12 Carson Palmer Still Can Do No Wrong By You
He had X number of sacks last week, played like crap, turns the ball over...
But did you see him light Notre Dame up like a Christmas Tree his senior season? He was amazing. That's Carson Palmer, son... Carson Freakin Palmer!!
Of course, on the other hand....
No 11 Reggie Bush Is Dead To You
No 10 You Have More Cardinal & Gold Clothes Than Any Other
Wait... there's other colors to wear?
Oh, right. White. For away games. That's right.
No 9 You've Named At Least One Pet 'Traveler'
You also know that Traveler is a horse and his rider is not named Tommy.
Tommy is a statue. Get it right.
No 8 You Have Never Spelled 'UCLA' All The Way Out
Wait, you mean the name of the school isn't 'fucla'???
Next thing you're going to say is they capitalize the B in bRuins. You're funny.
No 7 You Have Actually Prayed For Silas Redd's Knees
Silas Redd was delivered to USC in the most dire of circumstances, brought the gift of rushing yardage, brought light to a darkened ground game, and if someone says that wasn't divine providence -- they're a heathen.
No 6 This Never Happened
There was no Rose Bowl in 2006. You're mistaken. They cancelled it that year.
No. IT. NEVER. HAPPENED. Stop saying "Vince Young."
No 5 This Guy Can Do Whatever He Wants
The USC Drum Major can stab any 50-yard line in any stadium in the nation if he wants to. In fact, if the Drum Major wanted to stab your front lawn, you'd thank him for the honor.
Also, it's your duty to smack anyone who calls him "Tommy." Once again, Tommy is a statue.
No 4 Part Of You Still Gives Lane Kiffin The Benefit Of The Doubt
He wasn't that bad. He was coaching under sanctions.
Keep telling yourself that and it might be true
No 3 Notre Dame Has No Legacy To You
Rudy was a terrible movie, gold helmets are stupid, that fight song is annoying, Joe Montana and Regis Philbin are lame, and it's amazing how huge the landfill in South Bend, IN is.
Unless by 'legacy' you mean 'crap'....
No 2 You Tried To Name Your Kid 'Marcus Ronnie'
Because there's already enough Carsons, Matts, Mikes, and Charlies out there.
... and you don't have the stones to try for 'Orenthal'.
No 1 You Have No Friends From October To January
....just other members of the Trojan Family.