5 Reasons Why a Cold Super Bowl Would Suck

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Introduction to cold weather football...

Steven Bisig-USA TODAY Sports

Throughout NFL history, the Super Bowl was always played in a warm weather climate, like Florida, Louisiana or Arizona, or within the friendly confines of a domed environment, such as Ford Field in Detroit, where weather would effectively be removed from the equation. This year, the Super Bowl will be held at MetLife Stadium in East Rutherford, New Jersey and it could prove to be a factor for some players.

As of this writing, the forecast high for Jan. 21 is 22 degrees Farenheit (F) with the low dropping to nine degrees. That's extremely cold by comparison to all previous Super Bowls, where the coldest game on record was Super Bowl VI held in New Orleans, La. The gametime temperature was observed to be 39 degrees F. Looking ahead at the average temperatures for East Rutherford in February, the high is projected to be 39 degrees F, with a low of 20 degrees F. It is a fairly safe bet to say that this year's Super Bowl will be the coldest in the history of the league.

The participants in the NFL's biggest game were determined over the weekend, with the Denver Broncos defeating the New England Patriots and the Seattle Seahawks overtaking the San Francisco 49ers. Denver and Seattle will meet on Feb. 2 in Super Bowl XLVIII.

This article does not comprehend how much more the game would suck if snow becomes involved. Discounting that fact, here are five important reasons why a cold Super Bowl will suck.

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Overall Game Performance

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Anyone who tries to tell you that the weather does not impact their performance or cross their minds at all during the course of a game is a complete liar (unless they are being asked directly by the media -- no one wants to use that excuse, because it's garbage). It may not be on the players' mind during an actual play, but before and afterwards it is. Just watch them and how they act. They are typically seen jumping and moving around trying to stay loose and warm. They sit in front of the torpedo heaters when they are on the bench. They wear the full-length jackets on the sidelines. It does exert a hindrance on their performance, even if they cannot admit it.

There could be less offensive production, sluggish response times, greater opportunity for injury and the like. This can decrease the value of the game to the fan, which is something the NFL should not want to do.

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Dreadfully Cold Concessions

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Who wants to stand up, negotiate their way from their seat into an aisle-way, walk up several dozen steps, find a concession stand, wait in line, order a super nachos, pay, walk back down the steps, negotiate their way from the aisle-way to their seat, sit down and enjoy delicious nachos with steaming hot cheese? Of course, you do. Everyone does. However, how would you feel about going through the entire process on a day of zero-degree weather, only to return to your seat to find clotted, miserable, cold cheese that breaks the first chip you try to dip? Yes, exactly. There's reason No. 4.

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Shortened Punts and Field Goals

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The ball simply doesn't travel as far in cold weather as it does in warm weather. Anyone who's tried to play outdoor basketball in sub-50 degree temperatures with a cold basketball can relate to this principle. It doesn't bounce as high. The reason has to do with the density of air, which is greater in cold weather than it is in warm weather. In addition, the surface material of the ball is more compressible in warmer weather than it is in colder weather, which allows for the exertion of greater energy, thus causing the ball to go further.

This will take some of the scoring possibilities out of the game and teams may need to rely on their offense being more aggressive when approaching the outer boundaries of their kicker's field-goal range.

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Whining by Broadcasters and Fans

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How many times have you heard broadcasters mention how cold it is during the course of previewing the game. "Our big story today is the cold weather, blah blah blah." It's New Jersey in February. It's not going to be hot, professor.

In the same vein, your Facebook news feed is going to blow up with status updates from your so-called friends exclaiming how cold it is at the Super Bowl. You additionally may see a fortunate friend post a photo of his car's temperature sensor while he's sitting in the parking lot tailgating.

These types of people make the world an annoying place to live for the rest of us. These types of people should all be segregated to their own state to be forced to interact with one another for the rest of time. Moving on...

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Potential for Beverages to Freeze Solid

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Here's a fun fact: Your beverage of choice can and will freeze at a certain temperature outdoors. Different beverages will freeze at different temperatures. Obviously, water freezes at 32 degrees F, so it's not the best drink to consume on a cold day.