15 Scary NFL Players You’d Hate to Meet in a Dark Alley
15 Scary NFL Players You Don't Want to Meet in a Dark Alley
While walking around the streets of your favorite city after the event of your choosing has ended, your path leads you to a horribly lit alley. Not having any other idea how to get from point A to point B, you slowly start to creep down heading towards the other end. Careful to not make much noise as to alert anyone or anything that you are coming, you happen to look up. All you see is a silhouette of a massive creature blocking the rest of your path. You were always warned about the dangers of walking down dark alleys, and now the nightmare has finally come true. Who or what could it be? Your head starts to spin out of control until finally you realize--
Okay, so that was a little bit more dramatic than it needed to be. Growing up I am sure I’m not the only person that heard the phrase: “Imagine meeting him in a dark alley?” Well to have a little fun I compiled a list of 15 NFL players that would fit the bill. Some are massive in stature and some are a bit smaller but wiry. Some choices are obvious and some not so much.
Coming up with this list was a bit harder than I expected. First off I had to admit to myself that I would be scared to walk down a dark alley. Then I had to publicly admit that there are people that I would hate to see in a dark alley. Once I was okay with all of that, I had to narrow it down to 15. These are 15 players currently in the NFL. Now I could put the normal players on this list like O.J. Simpson or Aaron Hernandez, but what fun would that be? Plaxico Burress was someone else who could have made the list, but let's face it; he would have been as much danger to himself as he would be to us in that situation.
This is based solely on the way they play the game of football and not on any aspect of their personal lives. I am sure off the field they are kind, courteous fathers, husbands, boyfriends or friends in general. This is for entertainment purposes only.
15. Andrew Whitworth, Cincinnati Bengals
The first person on my list has played eight seasons so far in the NFL. Playing in 120 games while starting 116 of them, 6-foot-7 335-pound Cincinnati Bengals tackle Andrew Whitworth is massive. He was picked mainly for his size and his durability. Offensive players don’t necessarily have the killer instinct that a defensive player does, because their main job is protecting not attacking. Whitworth would also make the list of players I would like to walk next to me while walking down a dark alley.
14. David Stewart, Tennessee Titans
Next on the list is another offensive lineman for the Tennessee Titans. Tackle David Stewart, who would match up nicely with Andrew Whitworth, also stands at 6-foot-7 but is a much lighter 313-pounds. The 31-year-old Georgia native has played nine seasons in the NFL and has played in and started 116 games. Much like Whitworth, Stewart is the kind of guy that you want on your side in a tussle but would still scare you a bit if you happened across him in a dark alley.
13. Steve Smith, Carolina Panthers
Next up is 13-year NFL veteran Steve Smith. Smith may only be 5-foot-9, but he plays much larger and is one of the wiry guys I was mentioning in the opening. Playing in 182 games during his career and amassing over 12,000 yards with 67 touchdowns all for the Carolina Panthers, Smith has the ability to frighten anyone lining up across from him. He has been doing it a long time, and if he didn’t have a little of that killer instinct he wouldn't have lasted as long.
12. Mario Williams, Buffalo Bills
In order to make it in this league you have to have the desire to work hard and the will to win. If you are a No. 1 overall pick there is much added pressure. Making it on this list is Buffalo Bills sack master Mario Williams. Williams was the No. 1 overall pick for the Houston Texans back in 2006 and played there until 2012 when he signed on with the Bills. Williams is enormous and fast. His arms are so big that if you were to take off his hands and put feet there they would be able to run the 40-yard dash in 4.0 seconds.
11. Greg Hardy, Carolina Panthers
One of the youngest players on this list is defensive end Greg Hardy. ardy plays for the Carolina Panthers and was third in the league in sacks in 2013. He is a little on the smaller end for his position in my opinion but is able to get the job done. His intensity is admirable, and I know that I wouldn’t want to line up across from him let alone find myself starring him down in an alley. Hardy is still on his way up and will be a force in this league for quite some time.
10. Cortland Finnegan, St. Louis Rams
What is there to say about Cortland Finnegan that you haven’t already heard? Finnegan is feisty as they come. Ask any receiver who has had the pleasure of almost getting their head ripped off by the cornerback. In fact, he actually had a run-in with another guy on this list, Steve Smith, on more than one occasion. This list is probably too long to add all of the names that he has had incidents with, so that is why he is on this one. Finnegan has played eight seasons and has almost 500 tackles in his career.
9. Brett Keisel, Pittsburgh Steelers
I am not sure if it is just the beard or what, but the next player on the list is Brett Keisel. Keisel stands at 6-foot-5, and his beard about 3-foot-4. He plays defensive end for the Pittsburgh Steelers and is one of the older guys on this list. Keisel has played in 144 games in his career, recording nearly 400 tackles and 29 sacks. Again, I am sure outside of football he is a gentle giant, but I wouldn’t even want to cross his beard let alone him in an alley.
8. Terrell Suggs, Baltimore Ravens
The Baltimore Ravens are notorious for having scary players on their defense. One of the most feared, Ray Lewis, who recently retired would have made this list for sure. Stepping into his role as one of the most feared is linebacker Terrell Suggs. Suggs, who is a product of Arizona State, is entering his 12th season in the NFL. Missing only 11 games in his career, Suggs has 667 tackles and nearly 100 sacks. He is a force on the field and would be someone that I wouldn’t want to confront in an alley.
7. Brandon Meriweather, Washington Redskins
Described as a headhunter by his peers, the next person on the list is the Washington Redskins’ safety Brandon Meriweather. You have to be a special kind of person to play safety in the league. Long gone are the days of Ronnie Lott and Steve Atwater. The new player has to be so much more careful with their hits so they don’t draw flag. Well that doesn’t necessarily stop Meriweather, but you get the idea. His future with the Redskins might be up in the air, but rest assured he will be out there tormenting offenses anywhere he goes.
6. Patrick Willis, San Francisco 49ers
There isn’t much to be said that you can’t figure out just by looking at the next guy on the list. Patrick Willis is a terrifying defender for the San Francisco 49ers who is entering the prime of his career. Having over 100 tackles every single season in his career except one (97), Willis is all over the field destroying anything in his path. Willis will surpass 1,000 tackles in 2014 in under 120 games. He is a guy I would quickly want to become friends with so this scenario never happens.
5. Jared Allen, Minnesota Vikings
For 11 seasons, this guy has been terrorizing everyone and everything that crosses his path. That is one reason why he made this list. Jared Allen of the Minnesota Vikings is a special kind of player. He has been playing at such a high level for a long time, and there is no telling when he will slow down. Allen's 128.5 sacks in 157 games is extremely impressive. He would petrify me in an alley way, but then I would find something we have in common and become friends so I could rest easy, unlike quarterbacks in the NFL.
4. DeMarcus Ware, Dallas Cowboys
DeMarcus Ware. Do I really need to say anything else? The 31-year old defensive end for the Dallas Cowboys is the kind of guy you want in the trenches with you -- not someone you want to go toe-to-toe with. He dominates when he is on the field which is one of the reasons why he made this list. Going out game after game with reckless abandon makes Ware a force to be reckoned with.
3. Richie Incognito, Miami Dolphins
The No. 3 man on this list has certainly gotten himself enough press over the last couple of months. Known mainly for his unsportsmanlike conduct penalties, Richie Incognito would be one of the last people I would ever want to confront. Even expensive sports cars don’t stand a chance against him. He is the kind of guy that if I saw him in an alley I would turn around and go back where I started and wait until it's light out to find my way home. It doesn’t seem like there is any chance of becoming friends with him, so that is the best bet.
2. James Harrison, Cincinnati Bengals
We are almost at the end of the list. No list of people who put the scare into others would be complete without James Harrison. Harrison, now with Cincinnati Bengals, was a mainstay with the Pittsburgh Steelers for several years terrorizing everyone, including teammates. Harrison is as nasty as they come and that will never change. Your best bet if confronting him in an alley is to call him “sir” and ask if there is anything you can do for him before he beats you down. The league will miss his tenacity when the day comes for him to retire.
1. Ndamukong Suh, Detroit Lions
The last person on the list that I would hate to meet in a dark alley is none other than Ndamukong Suh. The Detroit Lions defensive tackle has been a thorn in the sides of everyone he goes up against. He has punched and kicked his way into the headlines every single week. He tackles everything he sees and plays with a chip on his shoulder. He has changed the scope of the Lions' defense, and he is more of a throwback type player with a desire to win and a desire to punish. He instills fear. Meeting him in an alley would certainly be your demise.
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