The Washington Redskins‘ defensive backfield has arguably been the league’s biggest pushover for … much longer than I care to study about at this time. Old news, right? The secondary has catered a vanilla aggression and sauerkraut gridiron intellect since Aunt Jemima was waving a spatula in her crib. To put matters — you know — as nicely as possible, the Redskins’ aging, recycled and inhaler-happy defensive backfield hasn’t even had the appropriate seasoning to be ranked beneath the league’s substructure.
A third-string signal caller on a Pee Wee league’s IR list would mirror a hybrid of NFL standout Russell Wilson and legendary offensive wizard Peyton Manning against Washington’s internally bankrupt and disabled secondary.
Long-standing Model T safety Reed Doughty‘s departure from the club is most welcomed news. The eight-year veteran was often criticized by Washington’s fan base for being a glaring liability for the team’s defense. And Doughty chronically stood out in the unit’s secondary for reasons which he probably wouldn’t want to stand out for — mainly being a sitting duck and one of a cast of weak links on Washington’s defensive depth chart for average flankers to mow through, en route to the end zone.
Washington’s front office, management and newly employed coaching staff decided that was going to be a problem and made a motion to provide insurance coverage in the team’s secondary by signing aging liability never-has-been and never-will-be DB DeAngelo Hall, as well as Tanard Jackson, who will laboriously try to jump-start his game after the league paddled his behind with a two-year suspension — the third of his career — on the grounds of substance abuse. Oh, this generator’s just getting warmed up. I’ve saved the best part of this four course entree for last. Redskins personnel director Bruce Allen has also signed the services of prehistoric safety Ryan Clark from the Pittsburgh Steelers.
Awkward pause. Time to press the panic button. Is there anyone in the house that fully understands the value of signing quality, young and semi-intelligent defensive backs to anchor a secondary that doesn’t have anyone using a prescribed life support system when the offense has been deployed? But of course. That’s the general idea. All rise. The battle tested and proven Tracy Porter, presiding.
The reputable six-year veteran DB has proven to be quite a force in the secondary no matter who he has played for or where he has lined up. Having stints with paramount NFL defenses like the New Orleans Saints and Denver Broncos, the electric, ball-hawking defensive back’s reputation precedes him. Porter displays tremendous awareness in the secondary, manipulating rival signal callers’ reads and decisions in clutch situations. He is also infamous for injecting chronic migraines into the league’s principal offensive minds with his uncanny nose for the ball and proficiency in diagnosing and extinguishing plays almost before they begin. And — he is still in his prime! A foreign concept to those on the Redskins depth chart.
Washington hasn’t had a reckoning presence roaming center field since Champ Bailey packed his back and airmailed himself to Denver. With Porter installed in the secondary, rival signal callers will balk before chancing a pass on his side of the field.