NHL commissioner Gary Bettman said a ”wide gap” remains in labor talks between the league and the NHL Players’ Association. His harsh words come less than a a day after the players union presented its offer.
With the two sides this far apart at this stage of the off-season it is becoming increasingly likely the league could be headed for its fourth work-stoppage in the last 20 years.
Not to worry. While nothing can compare to watching NHL hockey, I have managed come up with 10 very unique ways to bide your time in the event of an NHL lockout, at least until the two sides finally pull theirs heads out of the sand and get a deal done.
10. Learn how to play golf. – For some of you this should come naturally, especially if you are a Minnesota Wild fan. For others this could be challenging (See Detroit Red Wings fan). Don’t worry if you live in a cold weather state; I hear Wii golf is just as thrilling. Nonetheless, golf is a great way to kill time and the way these labor talks are going, time may be all we have in the fall.
9. Glacier surfing – Seems to be all the rage with the X-treme crowd. In case your not familiar with the sport yet I’ll go ahead and fill you in. Basically, you sit for hours on a surfboard in frigid Arctic waters waiting for a giant piece of glacier to break off and crash into the water. Next, you surf the enormous waved created by the chunk of ice’s impact with the freezing water. This sport kills two birds with one stone; Observe global warming at it’s core and enjoy a fun new hobby!
8. Learn a foreign language – Ever follow somebody on twitter that only writes in French? This is a great opportunity to brush up French action verbs or finish that “How to Write Mandarin Chinese” tape you bought years ago. Trust me, your chance of learning Chinese is far greater than the possibility of the NHL season starting on time.
7. Watch all four Seasons of “Breaking Bad” on Netflix – Why? Because you are missing out on a great show. Even if there is hockey you should be doing this.
6. Learn YoYo tricks – Amaze your friends and family with a stunning new repertoire of YoYo acrobatics. Have you ever been the life of the party? No? Now is your chance!
5. Learn how to whistle – I’m gonna show you how to do it and we start real slow. You just put your lips together and you come real close….OK you get my point.
4. Watch Basketball – There is nothing wrong with forgetting about hockey and filling your free time with a little bit of Hoops. Remember last year, when the NBA had its labor issues? Didn’t all those NBA fans stuff NHL arenas while they waited out the labor drama? Oh, wait…those were just Lakers fans stuffing the Kings bandwagon because they were about to win that shiny thing. Sorry, my bad.
3. Donate $1 to the save a pro athlete fund – We all know how tough these economical times can be. What better way to say you care than to help out a pro athlete in need, especially in the event of a lockout or strike. If we all give just $1 we can help buy at least one player new shoe laces for his 1,000 pairs of Air Jordan’s.
2. Play MineCraft – “MineCraft is a game about placing blocks to build anything you can imagine. At night monsters come out, make sure to build a shelter before that happens.” Oooooo, that sounds like a riot, (Sorry Vancouver)! My kids seem to enjoy spending hours playing this game, especially when its time to do their homework or chores. Maybe it would work for you too; Unless you already play it. In that case I feel so sorry for your parents upstairs. I hope they have a big basement.
1. Write a Blog – Start a blog and chronicle every day of the lockout with witty anecdotes and clever puns. Turn that into an online empire. Hey it can happen. God knows you’ll have enough time to perfect your writing because I have a feeling we are head for 1992 and 2004 combined.
This is going to get very ugly before its resolved. What are you waiting for? You better start now. Go on. Go!
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