Going from football to WWE isn’t exactly uncharted territory. There was a fellow known as Dwayne Johnson who pulled this stunt straight from the CFL, and Beast Mode Marshawn Lynch is poised to parlay his hard-nosed rushing tactics into a gig with Vince McMahon and company.

Lynch has been contemplating retiring from the NFL and leaving the Seattle Seahawks high and dry in the backfield. What most may not know is that there are ulterior motives behind this supposed retirement that include Lynch trading in his pads and cleats for a banana hammock.

Apparently several wrestling personalities have sought out the Beast Mode moniker since Lynch began using it, but McMahon and WWE have reserved that name for the Beast himself. There would be no need for Lynch to worry about getting fined for missing media appearances or quibble over his compensation with ownership, because there’s no doubt McMahon would be willing to shell out how ever much cheddar Beast Mode requires to get him in the ring.

Obviously the Seahawks tried to quash these rumors by upping Lynch’s salary for the next two seasons and keeping their Super Bowl hopes alive, but there’s no doubt that the running back’s heart lies with WWE. He could truly be himself inside the ring with no obligations to speak or engage with the media in any way whatsoever.

Of course, there could be some potential copyright infringement issues with the 1990s group D-Generation X when it comes to his propensity for crotch-grabbing celebrations. Everyone knows they had the market cornered on that front, but I’m sure that’s the least of the Beast’s worries at this point. Look for him on a turnbuckle near you very soon.

Coleman Slawski is a complete fool. Seriously, check him out.