The BBC’s Washington correspondent Simon Wilson wrote an article calling baseball a metaphor for America because it was “slickly-packaged razzmatazz”. Has baseball ever been described as razzmatazz before? This guy thinks baseball is glitzy because the British sport is soccer, which is about as exciting as watching tortoises mate. We can make fun of baseball, because we are Americans. We can call baseball players pampered, over-paid, and whiny, but they are our pampered, over-paid, and whiny players. So Simon, why don’t you shut your pompous British pie hole, and go back to your gloomy little, soccer-loving island. We have some slickly-packaged razzmatazz to watch you wanker!
Dwyane Wade‘s first wife, Siohvaughn Funches is protesting outside the Daley Center in Chicago to embarrass Wade. If you have trouble with the pronunciation of her first name the “h” is silent: it is pronounced ‘gold digger’ Siohvaughn is trying to generate sympathy for her plight. But as you notice, she can’t even hold her own protest sign. Shiovaughn, even panhandlers hold their own signs for God’s sake. And shame on Dwyane for marrying her in the first place.
Florida linebacker Antonio Morrison was arrested early Sunday morning for resisting arrest and with barking at a police dog. His excuse, “He barked at me first.” Some police dogs are trained to sniff out drugs. Unfortunately for Antonio this dog was trained to sniff out idiots. The dog barked at him, and he confirmed that the dog was correct by barking back at him.