I am Merril Hoge.
My Mantra
My NFL dream started at an early age thanks to the words “Find A Way”. Those words are incredibly important to me for two reasons: They have helped me live a dream – and fight to live. “Find A Way” literally resonates with me in every facet of my life.
“Find A Way” became my mantra when I was just 12 years old. That was when I set a goal of playing in the NFL. The great thing about that age is you can’t deter a determined child. When I was a kid, I became accustomed to the following reactions from adults when I shared my NFL dream:
“Oh, you know what the odds are of you playing in the NFL, right”?
“Do you know how hard it will be to actually get to the NFL”?
“Son, I don’t want you to be disappointed. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.”
“Let me give it to you straight – it’s impossible.”
It was those regular doses of cynicism that I constantly thought about while mounting the statement of my NFL goal on an 8” x 10” card on the cork board in my bedroom in Pocatello, Idaho. That card would remain on that cork board for a decade. I’ll always remember how the phrase instantly ignited me.
My message to young children with dreams is this: Your mindset is critical. You must only pick one path. If you pick doubt and fear, they will win. It takes the same amount of energy to focus on taking action and striving to accomplish your goal as it does to be a skeptic. “Find A Way” helped me overcome all the discouragement and avoid skepticism. Without “Find A Way,” “I want to play in the National Football League” would have been a meaningless sentence on a kid’s bedroom wall.
As an adult, I have implemented “Find A Way” with my children, and during my battles with cancer and brain trauma. As you’ll see, I’ll never stop finding a way.
My First NFL Game
Fast forward to 1987. I’m a member of the Pittsburgh Steelers and we are playing the Washington Redskins in RFK Stadium in Washington, I’m 22 years old and 2,400 miles from home. I am the sixth or seventh running back on the depth chart, so there’s no reason my number will be called.
My best friend came to Washington to support me. I spotted him in the stands behind the end zone during warm-ups and I was blown away. I ran over to talk to him and one of my veteran teammates said, “Hey, you better be focused on the game, rookie.” I told him, “Don’t worry, I’m ready. I just want to take a second to say hi to my best friend.”
Shockingly, coach put me in at the start of the second quarter. I didn’t even have time to think, which was probably for the best. I carried the ball for 15 yards on my first run. Now, I’m not bragging – quite the opposite, in fact. The hole created by our linemen was so big, I probably should have run for 30 yards; but the combination of nerves and excitement had me so revved up, I couldn’t feel my legs!
I made it to the NFL. I found a way.
Back to Pittsburgh — For Heart Surgery
When I discovered I needed open-heart surgery for an enlarged aortic vessel that needed to be repaired, I had it done in Pittsburgh of course. Why? Because being in Pittsburgh always feels like a home game to me.
I did, and there it is again: “Find A Way.”
My Hero
We weren’t necessarily a close family, but my folks always provided for us and I’ll never forget them for that. Sadly, my mom died when I was very young. When my Dad was involved with us, he ruled with an iron fist. So, my childhood hero was someone who I had never met.
The legendary running back of the Chicago Bears, Walter Payton, meant the world to me. Indirectly, he was responsible for increasing my love for football and more importantly, teaching me about life from afar.
I loved Walter Payton. I loved what he stood for, and the things that made him a great athlete and man. Payton wasn’t the biggest, strongest or fastest running back, but he was the best running back. He was the best because of his mindset.
Simply put, he wanted it more than anyone else. His training and practice was on another level than everyone else. To me, what separated Payton was that he got the most out of his God-given abilities. As a kid, I thought, “I can do that. I can control getting the most out of myself.” That is a lesson I continue to share.
My Favorite Current Athlete
If you asked me to name my favorite athlete in any sport four years ago, I might have chosen a golfer or an NFL athlete. But today – and yeah, of course I’m biased – I want to share a little bit about my son Beau, who is currently playing football at BYU.
I’ve coached Beau since he was seven years old. He’s developed into the smartest, most instinctive football player I have ever seen. More importantly, he has molded himself into one of the most incredible men I have ever met. Despite my age, there are many times when Beau gives me guidance. I’ve learned so much from him about composure, sportsmanship, grace and respect.
When he was a junior in high school, Beau was not chosen to be the starting quarterback. I thought he deserved it, but his coach went with a senior. I’m not going to lie – I was not happy about it. I’m not one of those parents who rants and raves, but this time I wanted to make the case for him.
Beau told me to not say a thing. He would ask his coach if he could play wide receiver, do his best and wait for the opportunity at quarterback. That should have been my advice to him! Instead, it was Beau who saw the situation more clearly. Sure enough, he played QB, had an amazing season and was recruited by BYU and other colleges.
He told me, “All’s well that ends well.” Again, as the father, I should have been the one giving that advice. Beau has made me incredibly proud and is my favorite athlete.
The Greatest Thing I Ever Learned (To Apply as a Parent and Coach)
Judge your kids in the yardsticks of their years, not yours.
This philosophy has helped me avoid many mistakes. When my son was five and would do the kind of silly thing a five-year-old might do, I looked at him as a five-year-old – not a 35-year-old. I had the same approach when I coached youth football. Are many kids going to care more about pizza and video games when they get home? Of course, and that’s okay.
Don’t lose your patience over how they are. Let them act their age, not what you think they should be. Rather than being discouraged, you’ll find an understanding.
Why Athlete Originals?
Athlete Originals has been instrumental in helping me with my messaging and branding. I love that the apparel from Athlete Originals is “By Athletes For The Fans.” My credo of “Find A Way” is universal. It applies to everything and everybody. It is not focused specifically on cancer or head trauma, or lifestyle or anything else. It’s about each individual trying to “Find A Way.”
When I was putting those words on my bedroom wall about someday making it to the NFL, living the mantra of “Find A Way” and reading up on my idol Walter Payton, I was still going to the library in search of inspiration. One of the sayings I came across was from the philosopher Aristotle. He declared, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” That has stayed with me forever.
Be excellent. “Find A Way.”