Had to put Tyson on the list. I don't even know where to begin with him. I could always go with "I want your heart, I'm going to eat your children," or maybe I could go with "I'm going to gut him like a fish," or my personal favorite: "I'll eff you till you love me exploited deleted." Those will do, I can't spend all day on Tyson; actually I could if I wanted to.
In a recent Sunday Night Football game, during the video introductions for the starting defense, crazy man Terrell Suggs introduced himself as "Hacksaw." I guess all he needs is a 2x4 and to yell "hoooooooo" at the top of his lungs. That one's for you, wrestling fans.
"There are a lot of pundits and ignorant idiots who thought, 'Oh, the Seahawks are going to lose this game.' Well please, please don't doubt us again," Richard Sherman told NBC's Michele Tafoya after a 29-3 blowout win against the San Francisco 49ers. You got to respect a guy who backs up his trash talk and Sherman talks a lot.
Yeah, I know his name is Metta World Peace now, but I don't think the word "peace" should be anywhere near your name when you're the type to start a near riot during a basketball game. With Artest, I had a ton of goofy quotes at my disposal to choose from, and this is the one I'm running with: "Monkey's are good at trusting their muscles and being knowing no matter what move they will catch the next branch." I could hear the TV announcer now, "See the newest episode of Ron Artest Crocodile Hunter right after Jersey Shore."
I mentioned this earlier in the intro. The exact quote was, "I never knew that was in the rule book," McNabb said this after being in a tie game. That's funny, I knew that NFL games could end in a tie when I was eight years old. I understand that McNabb didn't know, he's only a multiple-time Pro Bowl quarterback.
Jason Kidd may be a wise coach now, but after being drafted as a rookie, he had this to say, "We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees." Aw, poor guy. Can we give half credit at least?
"I'm traveling to all 51 states to see who can stop 85." This quote came from attention starved Chad Johnson, or Ocho -- whatever his name is. It was always Chad's dream to play for all 33 NFL teams.
"Hey, if he (Ted Ginn Jr.) breaks it for some reason, go out to the field and tackle him." This is what Baltimore Ravens QB Joe Flacco said to teammate Dennis Pitta on the sideline right before, what would be the final play of the game (the Ravens were kicking off). What our silly little quarterback didn't know is there's a rule for that, and the score would have been awarded.
"Never bet on baseball." For 14 years this was uttered by the should-be Hall of Famer Pete Rose. He finally admitted his wrong doing in an interview right before his book came out. Coincidence? You be the judge.
"I can't remember the names of all the clubs we went to." This was Shaq's response to a question asked about a recent trip he made to Greece. The question was, "Did you go to the Parthenon?" Shaq might be on to something, turning an ancient temple into a club would be kind of cool.
"I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid." Well said, Mr. Bradshaw. In related news, I like drinks better than beverages, I like Marinara sauce better than red sauce, and I like Calamari better than squid.
"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." That Norman Einstein is a genius all right, just like Sir Isaac Fig Newton.
"I want to kiss you." I couldn't resist putting this one on here. Joe Namath said this to sideline reporter Suzy Kolber twice on national television. Kolber is good looking woman, Joe had to have some liquid courage to make that move. Makes you wonder if he made a "guarantee" with his buddies before hand. I could just see them up in the box as it was happening "Whoa! I can't believe he did it bro, pass the Funyuns."
"I don't need the recognition and I did not expect it." This is coming from diva wide receiver Terrell Owens, a guy who pulls sharpies out of his shoes to sign a football during a game; a guy who goes out of his way to mock the Dallas star; a guy who lifts weights in his driveway knowing a dozen reporters are there. Yeah, this sounds like a guy who doesn't need recognition.
Going from one diva receiver to another. The great Randy Moss had this to say when asked about how he was going to pay a fine, "Straight cash, homey." The fine came after he pretended to moon Green Bay fans after a touchdown. It's okay, though, he only fake moons people when he wants to.
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