Since we are a site dedicated to sports rants, we have compiled a list of the top 10 sports rants of all time. From head coaches to players, this list shows just how fired up some people get in the heat of the moment.
Warning: some videos may contain graphic language, to some people.
- Booker T
While most rants are unpredictable and off the wall, we should start with one that is not the longest or most complex, but one that has ridiculous clothing,ridiculous video quality, ridiculously sized men, and in the context of a ridiculous “sport”. It is what it says, and it is Booker T not only calling Hulk Hogan a racial slur, but calling Hulk Hogan an untrue racial slur. Apparently a dictionary with the word “cracker” in it is not part of the then WWF school.
- Dan Hawkins
If fans of Colorado Football didn’t already know what level their team was playing at before, Dan Hawkins reminded them. Fans of the team may not have known it based on some of the recent play of a team known better for its off the field sexual assaults than for its on the field “terrible” girl kickers, but the Buffaloes were actually a division one team, playing in the Big XII and not of the intramural or club level. Thankfully for all, Coach Hawkins’s voice cracked like a twelve year old boy, and everybody was safely reminded of the prestige and greatness of the Colorado football program.
- Joe Kine
While not the most traditional rant, Joe Kines halftime thoughts of the 2006 Independence Bowl are an ode to something that you just don’t see that often anymore, good old fashioned man talk that can be understood only with subtitles. While it appears to most that Kines had no idea of what he was talking about, Im pretty sure thats how people of his ilk are, talking with great speed, and, as it appears, the great pain that only talking after smoking three packs a day for fifty years can bring.
- Dennis Green
While in retrospect we may see that what Dennis Green was going on about made some sense (the Bears are the same team the Cardinals thought they were at the start of the game, Green thought his boys could beat the Bears, but gave it away), it is the hysteria and timing of all this that really makes this great. Monday Night. Undefeated Bears. Matt Leinarts first career start. Grossman Bad, the Defense Good. Quick Turnaround. Missed Kick. Bears Win. While football fans from Chicago to Glendale were trying to figure out what in the hell just happened. Dennis Green gave a press conference that got all it could out of the thirty seconds that it lasted He entered. He yelled. He left. That was it. Leaving the media and all of us to dissect what he just said, while also trying to wonder what the hell happened to Sex Grossman. Dennis Green left behind not only a legacy as one of the best press conferences ever, but eventually one damn good Coors Light commercial.
- Mike Gundy
What makes this three minute time in the life of Oklahoma State football, maybe the greatest, if not best, three minutes in its history, is the fact that Gundy is really right on this subject. Gundy was doing a fantastic job as coach in defending his player The article was far to harsh on a college kid, who to best of our knowledge, was doing his best to help out the team. College kids earning no pay (well publicly at least) are far to often subjected to harsh critisicsms. Gundy ripped the writer for what he is, and then went out to remind that writer, who of coursed missed Gundys birthday, just how many candles he blew out on his “Happy Birthday Coach Gundy” cake.
- Chris Russo
Now we couldn’t go a whole list without a mention of a rant from someone who actually gets payed to rant and rave, could we? Well maybe we could have, but were not going to. The most recent of all on this list, this is an absolute cracker laid out by Chris “Mad Dog” Ruuso. Once the king of sports talk radio in New York, Russo has been relegated to the still unknown market of satellite radio. While switching to XM may have worked for some, it certainly has not treated Mr. Dog as well, who not only has his own show on XM, he has his own damn channel. Ranked outside of the top 100 stations on satellite radio, and angry at the production from his staff, Ruuso goes on a mind boggling and confusing he-must-be-senile rant, bringing up everything from the stations lack of performance to the Nadal-Federer Rivalry to uhh Gone with the Wind? Needless to say, this is one of those rants that you must truly hear to believe.
- Andy Roddick
He is the current great hope for US Tennis. He is a former Grand Slam Champ. He was one the top ranked tennis player in the world, has had endorsements, and best of all, dated Mandy Freaking Moore. Yet Andy Roddick also carries the same stigma that John McEnroe did. Like most athletes that play on heart and emeotion, Roddick has been known to let his emotions get the best of him, and the Aussie Open last year may have been the best. In the middle of a third round, five set loss to Philipp Kohlschreiber, Roddick went on this one. Watch the end, where Roddick equates success in the early years of grade school to the chances of becoming a chair umpire.
- Darko Milicic
All I can say about this one is, thank god for translators and subtitles. Apparently all of the pain and anger of being one of the NBA’s biggest draft busts can take a toll on a man, oh and it also doesn’t help that your team just lost in overtime in the middle of Europe’s most prestigious basketball tournament, and you have the sneaking suspicion that the referees are all cock sucking pussies. Darko Milicic put on what is the most vulgar and crude sports rant of all time. He is the George Carlin of post game meltdowns. If only the man wre born in an English speaking country, then this might be the best sports rant ever, I mean assuming the entire country has HBO or even better for this type of language, Cinemax. It would have been very interesting to see how ESPN would have handled it, pretty much just so we could all see the record for most bleeps used in a minute long clip.
- Hale Mcrae
Several times when athletes or coaches go on long drawn out rants, or argue with umpires, or attack water coolers, naysayers and cynics cry that what we see is “fake” or “overdramatic”. The person in question has some other motive than just blowing off steam. While that could be tru for some, you would not want to tell Hal Mcrae that, unless you wish to get your phone ripped from the wall, or if Mcrae has gotten with the times, your cell/Iphone whipped against the wall. When he begins to swear, you think he might be just letting off steam. When he throws a cup, you think “OK he is either just being a drama queen, or maybe he is just trying to scare us”. But when writers with ugly polos and Jeff Kent/Porn star mustaches start leaving bloody, you know that Mcrae has just unleashed the most angry rant in the long and not so distinguished history of the Kansas City Royals.
- Lee Elia
Video Killed The Radio Star. Thats what the Buggles sang and thats what MTV showed on its first broadcast in August of 1983. Lee Elias rant just 4 months earlier in the caves of the Wrigley Field locker rooms may be the greatest evidence of it. What could very well be the greatest sports rant ever is now thrown to the side in favor of video that is able to show the sexy side of Jim Moras angry angry face. Everything about this rant is primed for eternal legacy. Its The Cubs. Its a BAD Cubs team. Its the middle of another dreary April, on the field, in the stands, and on the weather report. The team is one year away from one of its most famous seasons ever, and there is no reason to believe that a turnaround is near, so what happens when Elia’s cubs team is booed by a sparse Wrigley Field crowd? I believe the scientific definition is: All hell breaks loose. Elia gets off to a good start, using variations of fuck and shit. Then, turns to ask the Chicago fans to not only kiss his ass, but to also go downtown and PRINT IT!(I’m guessing he means to the newspapers, but i cant be sure). Next, Elia goes off on what could be the best of the rant, giving all that were listening a look at Chicago Demographics, saying that 85% of the population is employed, while 15% are without jobs, and all of the jobless come to Wrigley to watch baseball. The rest of the rant is filled with more f-s, b-s, a-s and so many more. We can only be thankful that a recorder was on during this rant, so we could fully enjoy all of its splendor. While it may not have the video that is needed in the same changing world that the Buggles warned us about when MTV was first born. Either way, video or not, Lee Elia’s rant on a dreary Chicago day in April 1983, was and still is, the greatest Sports rant ever.
Any I missed that you think should be included?
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